The ZEN Manifesto

Problems in the meme space & Zen's vision

Dis nareteev is boerkn.

As foreseen by the Degen Gods, memecoins are in a death spiral.

From infinite mint yield farms to ohm forks galore, the whale cabal hops from chain to chain and hype to hype, gobbling up all the greedy lil minnows along the way.

The ZEN token will not stop the whale cabal. No one can. Instead it will just find a little quiet corner and make peace with the prospect of zero or hero, and all in between.

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Word of warning!

Like all manifestos, this is a rambling one.

If you want an “ain’t reading all that, sorry or happy for you” TLDR of the ZEN vision:

Memecoin narrative dying on a vine

Memecoin Problems

1) greed overrides trust
2) shit memes that aren't even memes
3) "devs" aren't actually devs
4) spammy marketing, childish community
5) "normie onboarding" myth

Zen Solutions (or attempts at it)

1) Creating the "Circle of Trust Me Bro"
2) Infinity meme (can be used almost everywhere in crypto socials)
3) Roadmap (which is a meme within the meme)
a) Treasury & LP building,
b) ZEN single-sided staking for SOL yields,
c) Multichain ZEN
4) Adults in the room: smartooor marketing, nuanced community buildoooring (no paid callooors or KOLs.
5) Cater to DeFi Maxis (we don't need no normies, they ain't coming)

Ok, now the full meal 👇

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99 Meme Problems

1) Greed > Trust

We chuckle at old people getting scammed by Microsoft “anti-virus support”.

Then we turn around and drop $5k in a random dog pic because “hehe, it’s cute.”

Goodbye moneys.

Though it’s all on the blockchain and blah blah blah and all verifiable with DYOR and blah blah blah, the majority of us memooors still rely on animal spirits.

We could use all of the tools (bubblemaps, bullx, TTF, etc), but our trading decisions need to be fast or we “lose our good entry”.

On top of this, these fancy DYOR tools can be imperfect or manipulated by devious devs or the memecabal (seriously, just look up memecabal.co if you ever wanna be dissuaded from another token launch).

So again most memecoin trading decisions are made from animal spirits: 1) intuition/eyeballing, 2) KOL callers, or 3) degen social trust.

Degens are trying to feel if the choice is right, they’re following some KOL tweet (either because they trust the KOL or they think other people do), or they heard from a fren that this token looks “ready to explode”.

We can see the problem here, but honestly the only way it’ll get completely fixed is by everyone losing their money and the casinos going bottom up.

Which is not gonna happen - there’s always fresh funds & the casino always wins.

2) Lazy Cash Grabs

99% of these memes are terrible.

And 98% of them aren’t even actual memes.

“Memes” means you’ve got established virality.

Pics of random dogs & cats aren’t established virality, they are attempts to create virality through the token itself (price action & volume).

And as the most rekt of us already know, artificial virality dies when price goes down.

The only thing left in the aftermath is token cult members (aka poor bagholders terrified to sell the bottom).

3) Lack of Sustainability (aka devs aren’t actual devs)

99% of these freshly-launched memes die post-migration with the initial price action.

And the 99% of the ones that “make it” (ie survive more than 10 days) will still eventually die because of one simple fact: memes are meant to die.

They aren’t sustainable. If they were sustainable then they wouldn’t be memes.

So in order to survive, a memecoin must become something more.

And the problem with that is that all of these “devs” aren’t actually devs. They don’t code, they don’t integrate, they don’t connect their meme to the greater ecosystem around them.

It takes 20 seconds and 0.02 SOL to “dev up” a new token.

Suicidal crackheads can do this (and they have been).

4) Spammy marketing & fake community

Can we stop already with the twitter raids?

Spamming your CA on some lazy engagement farmooor is not gonna work, frens.

Spamming for an Ansem or Cobie reply is just silly.

Spamming fake volume TG buy bots doesn’t do anything.

Spamming for “trending status” is nonsense and purely pump’n’dump driven.

All of these practices lead to a community that’s only as strong as the price.

5) Propagating the myth of “normie onboarding”

The normies aren’t coming anytime soon.

When BTC breaks $250k and every degen is squabbling about ways to avoid the 45% US gov tax, then we might see some of these legendary normies.

But not now and not soon.

So stop with the “our meme is gonna onboard the Tiktok masses”.

We are purely PvP / degen vs degen, and go ahead and book another six years of it — will your memecoin still be alive in 2030?

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These problems are just the tip.

There’s much more that’s boerkn in the dark depths of on-chain tomfoolery.

So then, why launch ZEN?

If it can’t fix any or all of these issues, wouldn’t it just be another failed cash grab?

The short answer is “yup”.

But we still want to try - we still want to give something different a chance.

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Zen’s Vision

MemeFi: Meaty Meme, Spicy Utility

1) Built on a foundation of trust: The Accumulatooors

Since on-chain trust can be easily duped, how can we build a solid foundation (ie a solid price floor) with pure socials?

We use the “circle of trust me, bro”.

The early buyers of Zen are people we’ve known for years - we’ve had some successes together (too few perhaps), we’ve had lots of fun together, and most importantly, we’ve all been rekt together.

These early buyers have been handpicked, registered, and restrained (no one buys more than 3 SOL worth). Also, and maybe most importantly, none of us are poor. None of us need a 100x to save our bags or marriages. None of us care about quick flips (in fact we mostly hold our bags beyond rektage - the accumulaaaatoooors).

If there is a bad or irresponsible actor among us (and there was), they have something to lose (eg our respect and our years of frenship and shared social groups - and in some cases our actual Web3 jobs).

Up to ~$30k marketcap, there are no anons or sniper bots in our “circle of trust me, bro”.

The proof?

It’ll be found in the price, the transactions on chain, and our public communities.

It’s the “circle of trust me, bro” after all.

2) We have an infinity meme

“Infinity memes” can be used with all people, trends, and situations.

A decent example of this is Aura on Solana. People do something cool/good and they receive +aura, something stupid/bad and they receive -aura. Simple, easy to understand and usable almost anywhere on socials.

Our —ooor meme has been around for years.

Everyone in the crypto space recognizes it, laughs at it, shares it, and creates with it.

And it is omnichain ready. There’s nothing inherently Solana about the —ooors. They belong to all crypto spaces.

—ooors travel well.

3) An actual token roadmap (and yes, we know, that’s a meme in itself)

Our core “circle of trust me, bro” has real devs, experienced DeFi users & traders, and a real idea for what Zen can become.

Some basic actions done or on the way:

1. Dev Wallet → Liquidity Building

   We originally bought 110M ZEN tokens with ~3 SOL on Moonshot in order to deter any random anons from sniping a large chunk of the supply and allow the Circle of Trust Me Bro to get in.
   
   It worked.

   After successful migration, it’s not tenable for the dev wallet to hold 10% of the supply. It’s intimidating (looks like a rug) and pointless (it’s just sitting there, doing nothing for the project).
   

   Burning the token is a meme and it does nothing to support price or plans for the long-term survival of the project.

   
   So, instead we used the 110M to add to the thin Meteora LP!
   Primary LP Addition: Solscan
   
   In the end, this allows for lower price impact (especially early on), while also acting as a kind of “second round of fundraising” for the Zen Treasury.
   
   At the current ZEN MC (~$220k), we’ve managed to raise ~60 SOL (subject to fluctuate with price movements).

2. ZEN Staking & LP Building

   We’re very familiar with Meteora and its build.

   With the lifetime yield distributions in mind, the plan is simple:

   • Create a basic staking contract for ZEN which will distribute the SOL yields from the Creator’s 20% yield cut.

   • Use the ZEN yields to add to the treasury or sell-side liquidity in Meteora’s DLMMs (always spread thinly). Managed properly, this eliminates sell pressure on the chart & allows for bigger buyers to enter with less price impact. Eventually, we may consider making ZEN more deflationary by burning a % of the yields.

   

3. Multichain ZEN

   If moderately successful on Solana, we will pursue moving ZEN to other chains of interest (one of our circle loves Sonic ☺️).

   ZEN was created on Solana because of the meme and yield ecosystem, but we are by no means married to it forever.

   The Zenooor embraces all maxis.

Web3 Grownups

Of course, we’re going to have fun with the —ooor meme (that’s the whole point of being a meme token), but our socials and marketing will reflect who we are at the core: grownups with real lives, families and friends.

Basically, we don’t want to be embarrassed to say publicly that we hold this token.

In the end, we’ve decided to split our socials into three factions: the twitter community for the crypto twitterooors, the discord for the buildooors, and the TG for the hypooors.

Rationale for Twitter Community (for the twitterooors)

https://x.com/i/communities/1828305299268415932

Whether we like it or not, memecoin marketing is 99% twitter. We want our Zen twitter account and our strongest “raidooors” to be publicly visible to the twittersphere.

Rationale for Discord (for the buildooors)

https://discord.gg/sb3Shn5KPD

Discord is easier to token gate and organize into clear points of communication. It also helps maintain more transparency from the core members and provides clear spaces for collaboration.

Rationale for Telegram (for the hypooors)

https://t.me/+Ko7bMkgsCk41MmM1

A typical telegram does very little to contribute to the awareness and public distribution of your meme (in its basic form it simply acts as an echo chamber for moonbois & trolls). However! It can better foster a “hype vibe” among the ZEN tradooors and also open up some access to the project’s core members that they wouldn’t find on twitter.

ZEN caters to DeFi maxis

We don’t care about normies or their onboarding (for now at least).

We want our community to focus on attracting people like us - people that love the Web3 world.

Undoubtedly we will see the fudooors, panickooors, and trollooors.

But in the end, we envision a kumbaya utopia of yieldooors, maxi-chainooors, buildooors, memeooors, and tradooors alike.

Are you ready to start enjoyoooring with us, frenly anons?

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Just a disclaimer: we are aware that all of our fancy plans and ideas are contingent upon achieving trading volume. While we will strive for boosting volume however possible, there is great risk here (as with all memecoins & crypto).

Basically, don’t buy anything. This token is for entertainment purposes only and it is not a financial investment. And since Solana is run by the CIA as a way to take down the crypto industry, you shouldn’t even be reading this.

For no reason tho, we’re just gonna drop some stuff below 👇

ZEN CA

bxqc9uapnttxvg5xwqqevwuj6bpjq2qbehcbcrpbfvgp

Jup Swap

SOL → ZEN

Meteora
Meteora LP

We strongly recommend NOT buying if you feel uncomfortable.
We strongly recommend NOT buying in any large quantities (or small quantities of course since this is all a government sting operation).

Zenooor Twitter
Follow us on Twitter and jump in one of our community spaces if you’ve decided to nibble on some $ZEN.
https://x.com/zen_ooor